.. the Monkey Connections..

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Enceri
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.. the Monkey Connections..

Post by Enceri » 11 Nov 2017, 03:37

U.S.S. Almayer

2186

.. monkey business ..
It was a normal day on the U.S.S. Almayer, nothing appeared to be amiss, until a simple ARES report was made. Apparently some jarhead did something bad in the extended bunks, and the military police were tasked to clean it up, but what they saw left them horrified. Image

"B-Boss.. what the fuck?"
The Warrant Officer walked in, sighing as they let out a puff of their cigar. "I don't know rookie, but what I do know is.. some kinda monkey business is going on."

The rookie looked confused, but shut his trap and continued to look upon the horrid scene. The other military police mucked around the scene, putting down tape and bodying up the bag. "This looks.. wrong boss. What do you think happened?"

The Warrant Officer chewed on the butt of their cigar, looking closely at the beheaded corpse in the shower. "It's a suicide. No debate here."

The rookie looked shocked, "A.. a suicide? Boss.. his head is gone, no gun in sight, and his knife is in the corner of a room. There isn't any plausi-" he was cut off before he could finish his sentence.

"Listen rookie, it's a suicide. It's best if you don't press any further into it, got it?" he looked annoyed at the constant pestering of the rookie. "We found a note anyways, it's definitely a suicide, which the note confirms, which he held up to the rookie.

Image

"I.. alright boss, but something seems off about this." The rookie looked around once more, before walking out of the bathroom.

The other military police walked around the Warrant Officer, one of them sighing. "We can't have the new guy digging to deep boss, we're too deep into this."

"I know, the further he looks, the more bananas it will drive the new guy." at that remark, they went back to work, cleaning up the mess.



U.S.S. Almayer

Brig

Thirty minutes after the initial report..


The rookie was sitting there, relaxing, eating a donut or whatever when he decided to take a look around the brig while he was alone. He didn't have any current standing orders, so he decided to go take a gander around, re-look at the evidence they had gathered. As he was picking through it, looking at it all piece-by-piece, he was interrupted by a fellow officer. "Hey Rookie, you find anything interesting?"

He jumped, slightly startled at the sudden appearance, but didn't mind it. "Uh.. not yet, but I just can't piece it together. I can't find the monkey connections to the suicide.. something just isn't right.."

The officer nodded, sipping a hot coffee before shrugging. "Listen Rookie, it was a suicide, no doubt. I recommend just dropping it and get back to your patrols, it'll make it easier."

The Rookie paused for a moment, to rethink the evidence they had. Shotgun shells lying around, no shotgun in sight. Decapitated head, knife clean across the room. A note left in the middle of the room. There simply was no possible way it was a suicide, but seeing as how the other officers didn't like his prying, he backed off.

He finished his shift, without ever finding out the true.. monkey connections.


yeah this was a fun end of the round thing, that i decided to add my own memes into. the true story of what happened may never see the light of day.

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Kavlo
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Re: .. the Monkey Connections..

Post by Kavlo » 11 Nov 2017, 12:43

Shouldn't of shotgunned those monkeys.
Lochlann Healy the Marine Here's my good ol' dossier!

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ghostdex
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Re: .. the Monkey Connections..

Post by ghostdex » 11 Nov 2017, 14:21

A fitting story for Adan. Suicide via monkey
John 'Fixer' Donable
Kjuhte Luar-ke
Operative Delta
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Something a bit funny: http://i.imgur.com/lKfpvwd.png
The story of Operative Delta: https://imgur.com/Go3VIhs https://imgur.com/4K8AqdA https://imgur.com/mW7j52X

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TheMusician321
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Re: .. the Monkey Connections..

Post by TheMusician321 » 11 Nov 2017, 15:55

OH MY GOD YES
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Ed 'Wafflecone' Martin bites the Mature Hunter (251)!

I play as Ed 'Waffles' Martin or his sister, Amaryllis 'Pancakes' Martin.

Never Forget, Dust Raider. 10/15/17.

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Mook476
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Re: .. the Monkey Connections..

Post by Mook476 » 11 Nov 2017, 17:32

A quality meme, and I love it.
ImageImage Joakim 'Mook Sundberg some meme.
Image Image Bakuub R'ka some pred.

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Gorglol
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Re: .. the Monkey Connections..

Post by Gorglol » 11 Nov 2017, 17:34

Haven't laughed so much at something ingame in a while :P

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Enceri
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Re: .. the Monkey Connections..

Post by Enceri » 11 Nov 2017, 17:36

the punishment for wanting to commit suicide, is death by monkey swarm

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ghostdex
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Re: .. the Monkey Connections..

Post by ghostdex » 11 Nov 2017, 20:17

Enceri wrote:
11 Nov 2017, 17:36
the punishment for wanting to commit suicide, is death by monkey swarm
Thats what happens when you monkey around
John 'Fixer' Donable
Kjuhte Luar-ke
Operative Delta
Image
Something a bit funny: http://i.imgur.com/lKfpvwd.png
The story of Operative Delta: https://imgur.com/Go3VIhs https://imgur.com/4K8AqdA https://imgur.com/mW7j52X

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